Creating Healthy Boundaries in Relationships

t you can make sure that both people have their needs and wants met in the relationship. This can be a way that you can make sure that your values are not violated and can help to keep you independent and private.

Boundaries will help you to build happy and strong relationships.

Here are some boundaries that you need to discuss to have a healthy relationship:

  • Finances
  • Work
  • Sex
  • Past
  • Family
  • Friends
  • Being together.
  • Dating each other

Identifying Boundaries

Everyone has boundaries but not everyone has the same boundaries. You have to have clear boundaries when you are in a relationship and if you love your partner and they love you, these boundaries will work for both people.

Look at the boundaries that you have in your life. There is no right or wrong way to set up a boundary as long as you both agree with them.

Finances

Figure out who is going to pay what and when. Make sure you discuss things like how much to give to charities and how much to spend on special holidays such as Christmas or birthdays. Figure out if you want to split the payments half and half and who pays for the dates.

All of these are important boundaries that need to be discussed to stop there from being hurt in the relationship.

Work

Does work take place of other things in your relationship? Are you going to give more to your job than in your relationship?

Sometimes working is something that is unavoidable, and you have to be an adult when you enter into a relationship.

Sex

Some people keep this boundary open because sex is important in the relationship. It is important that you know what your partner wants and what they will or won’t do when you are having sex.

Past

Some people want to know everything about their partner. What do you want your partner to know? What do you want to know about them?

Be honest with each other on what you want to discuss and how much information you are willing to give.

Family

Do you want to go to all of the family gatherings? Who will you see on Thanksgiving? Is it okay for your partner to call your mom or your siblings if he needs advice?

If you have children from another relationship, are they included in the new relationship or are you keeping them closed off?

Family can be a big topic and you need to talk about it before you get too serious.

Friends

Do you want your partner to spend time with your friends or do you want those things to be separate? Are your friends, his friends because you are together? Does he have his own friends?

Having friends and being in a relationship can get complicated, so make sure you talk about this and make sure you have a boundary set.

Being Together

Talk about how much time you will spend together. Do you want to spend each weekend together or have time for your friends? Maybe you only want to see them a couple times a week.

Does your partner stay overnight or on the weekends with you? Make sure that you have boundaries so that your relationship does not get hairy.

Dating Each Other

Are you guys choosing to date only each other or can you date other people? Do you want to have an open relationship since you haven’t been together long?

Know where you both stand on this situation.

Talking is Important

Make sure that you discuss the boundaries of your relationship. Be open and ready to communicate about things, even when it is hard. Do not keep secrets from each other and learn to have open communication. Do not leave things to be a chance, talk about what to expect and what your partner should expect.

Prepare boundaries before you get too consumed with your partner. If your partner does not respect your boundaries, it could mean that you are with the wrong person.

Having boundaries can help you to have a strong and healthy relationship. Learn to talk with each other and learn to enjoy your partner.

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